Old Dogs, New Tricks: Fatherhood After 40 with Dan and Mick
[00:00:00] Dan O Keeffe: Welcome to the first episode of Old Dogs, New Tricks. I’m Dan O Keeffe, your Old Dog for this and future episodes. We started Old Dogs, New Tricks later than I would have liked. I first had this idea when I learned at the ripe age of 52, that I was going to have a child, my first child. And thought, what do I do with that? That’s crazy. I’m way too old for this. How do I cope with that?
[00:00:24] Dan O Keeffe: And as a creative, I run a public relations and marketing agency as well. And I’m also a co-founder of another company. I’ve got to find ways to put challenge into perspective. And how I started doing that was a simple little post on Facebook that I titled Old Dog, New Tricks, First-time Father Chronicles. And I’m still doing that when I can and gathered a decent little following around it. And one thing I’ll say that I love it when I’m out and about and I bump into people with whom I’m friends on Facebook, and they say, keep [00:01:00] posting those great videos of you and your son. And love following along and that is encouraging. And I finally, just a few months ago decided, let’s go ahead and do this podcast. And it’s called Old Dogs, New Tricks.
[00:01:15] Dan O Keeffe: And the intention is not just to talk to others like me, exactly. Now I will say, I did a little research after finding out that my wife and I were pregnant. And found out that only 1% of the American male population are men 50 years older who have had their first child. It’s a small segment of the population, but still a considerable segment. But I thought that was pretty limiting because there are a lot of great stories to tell out there beyond having your first child, which is a blessing and a wonderful occurrence. But let’s extend it instead to individuals, men and women who are 50 or older or in that soon-to-be 50 who are either starting something new, whether it be [00:02:00] on purpose or it just happened to them and they’re rolling with it, or who fell into something at that age and are figuring out how to make it work. And that’s what this is.
[00:02:11] Dan O Keeffe: And that said, I’d like to introduce our first guest, Mick Flynn. Mick Flynn is a recruitment specialist with Scripps Media. I should add too that he is my cousin, one of my best friends, he was the best man at my wedding, he is the godfather to my child, by the way, his name is Kai Donovan O Keeffe. And yes, a lot of Irish running through our families. Although on our mother’s side, that’s the connection, it’s very Italian, Bonadio is the maiden name. And I used to look a little Italian until all of this happened, right? Mick still definitely looks Italian, has it in him. And there are a few similarities that Mick and I share.
[00:02:46] Dan O Keeffe: One is that he and I both have now suffered as of late December in my case, the passing of our respective fathers. And actually, you can extend that further [00:03:00] to the other third of our family. Again, we’re all connected by our mothers. There are three of them. And that other third of the family, our Uncle Ted passed away several years ago. Mick’s father passed away in 2019.
[00:03:15] Dan O Keeffe: And my dad passed away in last December 10 of 2023. For better, for worse, we’re in that club together. And then finally, of course, Mick found out a little bit earlier than I did in his mid-40s that he was having his first child, he and his new wife at the time, Becca. They now have three children. His oldest, with Becca, is Nora, their youngest is Pierce.
[00:03:42] Dan O Keeffe: And then Mick is a bonus dad to Becca’s son, Vincent or Vince from a previous marriage. Did I get all that correct, Mick?
[00:03:51] Mick Flynn: He didn’t. That’s good.
[00:03:52] Dan O Keeffe: I didn’t know that was, all right. But I will do that now that you’ve shared that, just to bug them. So, we share a lot, not just in the way of family, but life [00:04:00] experience. And I thought I’d have Mick join as our first guest to give his perspective as to what it’s like to be a first-time father in his mid to late 40s. And of course, he came into it with I think Vince was a seven or eight at the time.
[00:04:15] Dan O Keeffe: Oh my gosh. Four at the time. Wow. Okay. And I’m getting forgetful because I’m old, but I’m an old dog. So anyway, Mick, what was that like for you, and granted you’re five years younger than me anyway, but you were younger than I was age-wise. You were in your mid-late 40s, whereas I was 52.
[00:04:33] Dan O Keeffe: But still, were you guys trying for that? Was it expected? Was it unexpected?
[00:04:37] Mick Flynn: Were trying, we were definitely trying. We both wanted kids. That was something we were trying for. And before I got married, I’d been single my whole life, which is pretty long. I was 43 when we got married, pretty long for someone to wait.
[00:04:49] Mick Flynn: I always tell people I just avoided my first divorce, by waiting that long and that worked out well.
[00:04:54] Mick Flynn: We were lucky with Nora and Pierce. Even though I was older, we were lucky that we [00:05:00] knocked it outta the park on both times. Both times we tried, and there you go.
[00:05:04] Mick Flynn: Pierce, he’s four. He’s my youngest. He is the buzzer-beater. I told Becca that by the time I’m 46 if you’re not pregnant, I’m getting snipped. I’m done but Pierce had other ideas. And so there we go.
[00:05:15] Dan O Keeffe: That’s great. And is that how Becca approached it with you? It was like, good job, Nick. You’ve knocked it out of the park.
[00:05:21] Mick Flynn: I think, there was a lot of just surprise. She expected it to be this long, drawn-out thing. But it just happened. Again, we were lucky and it just happened pretty quickly for us. I went from being completely single through my 20s and 30s into my 40s, to now I just turned 50, and I’ve got three kids and a dog, and a house in the suburbs.
[00:05:42] Dan O Keeffe: Good. You don’t make it have to make it sound like you’re defeated. It’s all good. I’m living in the burbs as well, man. I got a dog. Had the dog first. As long as he and Kai get along, it’s all good. And then, maybe share what it was like when you both found out that you were pregnant for the first time with Nora. Did that come to you together or [00:06:00] did Becca share that with you, or it’s mine?
[00:06:01] Dan O Keeffe: I was not ready for that. That was a doozy and I’ll get to that, but
[00:06:05] Mick Flynn: She did. So I drank a lot of coffee, and she was trying to come up with a creative way to tell me that she was pregnant. Because we were trying, she bought a coffee, like a white coffee mug, and had something in the coffee at the bottom of the mug, as you’re drinking it. It was a heart, I believe, or I forget what it said, which is probably bad.
[00:06:23] Mick Flynn: But it was four in the morning one day, it had to have been I guess, it was around December of 2017. And for some reason she woke up, she took the pregnancy test. And I realized that she’s not good at like with time telling, knowing what time it is.
[00:06:36] Mick Flynn: So she was excited at four in the morning, woke me up, and wanted me to drink coffee. And I’m like, okay, all right, whatever. And she wanted to watch, I think at the time we were binging Breaking Bad. So she wanted to watch. I’m like, all right, let’s do it. And she makes me coffee. And she puts this new coffee mug in my hand.
[00:06:57] Mick Flynn: I’m drinking coffee and I’m realizing this [00:07:00] is weird. But I see it, the little heart at the bottom of the mug. And then she realized, and then she told me she was pregnant, all excited. And I’m tired when this happened. As being tired at this age with kids.
[00:07:13] Dan O Keeffe: Oh, that’s a whole different level of tired.
[00:07:16] Mick Flynn: Oh, it’s just, yeah. So it got me ready that way. I think, she tried to make it really fun, but again, it just happened so quick. So I came home from work one day, and she had peed on the stick. It was positive. I came upstairs and then I think she tried to make it ceremonial and just gave it to me.
[00:07:34] Mick Flynn: And I looked at it. And with Nora, my first, I was like excited. Oh my gosh, this is amazing. When I saw for Pierce’s, I’m like, here’s another one. Okay. It’s fine. It was just,
[00:07:44] Dan O Keeffe: Let’s hope he never hears or sees this episode.
[00:07:47] Mick Flynn: I’m sure I’ll tell him, but it was different. But it’s great. I’m glad I’m this age having
[00:07:52] Dan O Keeffe: Why is that?
[00:07:53] Mick Flynn: In my 20s and 30s, when you were supposed to do this, I think it would’ve been a good dad, but I didn’t have probably the confidence I needed and just the [00:08:00] overall confidence that things are going to be okay. And at this age, it’s going to be fine. I know everything’s going to be okay. Doesn’t mean you don’t worry, but I’m just better prepared. And I know that it’s not about me. When you’re in your 20s and 30s, you’re still in about what’s best you.
[00:08:17] Mick Flynn: At least was. And now, I don’t really care.
[00:08:20] Dan O Keeffe: I’ve known you your entire life. And I’ve got all the juicy details, all the evidence. But in spite of that, I still think you would have been a great dad in your 20s or 30s. And of course, you are a great dad now, and a great godfather, as well. Absolutely.
[00:08:34] Mick Flynn: I like being called godfather. That’s great.
[00:08:35] Dan O Keeffe: Yeah, no kidding. I do enjoy that. And it’s funny too. Obviously, we’re not the first become dads in our 40s or 50s. But again, we are a vast minority of the male population in the US, at least. And everyone had talked about this prior to having our child or even shortly thereafter.
[00:08:54] Dan O Keeffe: I’m like, Oh my God, what am I going to do? They’re all like, you’re going to be fine. And you’re unencumbered now by the [00:09:00] concerns and the immaturity that you would have had in your 20s, certainly. And even in your 30s, perhaps, financially, if you want to say spiritually, I don’t know, comfort level, whatever, right?
[00:09:12] Dan O Keeffe: We’re more mature. And my wife is significantly younger than me, but still was an older mom when you consider pregnancy, right? What’s the geriatric pregnancy or whatever they call it, which is a horrible name? She was in her late 30s when that happened. But as a 50-year-old dad, other people will tell me, you’re going to be in great shape for having a kid because you’ve got a lot of that life experience either behind you or it will help to mold you into being a maybe a more patient dad, a better listener, all of those things.
[00:09:47] Dan O Keeffe: And so far anyway, I think that’s true. Although I will tell you, Kai, he is all in on the terrible 2s right now. It is crazy. And we have to think about and plan for when we’re going to take them out later in the evening. Like tonight, we’ve got [00:10:00] a soccer match to go to. We want to take them for the first time.
[00:10:03] Dan O Keeffe: It’s a later one. Oh man, it’s going to be interesting. But I do feel like, even though I don’t have quite the energy that I would add in my 30s, I should probably start taking testosterone or something, I do feel like I’m doing a fairly decent job at the whole fathering role.
[00:10:20] Mick Flynn: I would agree with that. Yeah. I’ve seen you in action.
[00:10:22] Dan O Keeffe: Well, thank I’m not fishing for a compliment, I think I’m doing all right.
[00:10:24] Dan O Keeffe: Anyway, but it changes. You and Tammy, when we found out, again, we had not planned on having kids. And we went back and forth on that a little bit before we got married, even. But we had fostered, for about three years, and those children are still in our lives.
[00:10:37] Dan O Keeffe: We had fostered them 100%, my wife’s young cousins. We got them when they were six and nine. They are now 17 and 15. 17-year-old is soon to be 18. 15 year old just turned 15 two days ago. We had been there, done that. They went back to their mom after three years. And we were like, all right, that was great. Glad we could have done that, but woo. I think I’m good without kids.
[00:10:58] Dan O Keeffe: And then ironically, [00:11:00] we were heading out for a friend’s 50th birthday celebration. It was on a barge, down on the river where we’re located in Cincinnati. And we boarded the barge, and Tammy was acting normally. I didn’t know anything was different. There were beverages on the barge and red solo cups. And of course, everyone was given a red solo cup. So I saw her drinking out of a red solo cup, and I was drinking out of my red solo cup. And I thought, okay, we’re on the same page here. And got down to the end of that track.
[00:11:31] Dan O Keeffe: And there was a bar that Mark wanted to get shots at. And so I’m like, I’m not a shots guy anymore, but sure. If that’s what you want to do, sure. Got off, they were taking drink orders. And who wants a shot? And Tim is like, I’m good, thank you. And I was jealous, man. I really don’t want to do shots, but it looks like you’re driving on. And I wish I could also abstain from the shots.
[00:11:50] Dan O Keeffe: Did our things, and then got back on the boat, and got home, got up to bed, and we’re both getting into our respective sides of the bed. It’s about [00:12:00] 11:30. And my right leg swung up onto the bed about to roll in. And she’s, Dan. Yeah, I need to tell you something. I’m like, okay. And I had a few cocktails in me by then.
[00:12:10] Dan O Keeffe: And she comes over to my side of the bed, and I was like, what is it, honey? She just looks at me and she says, I’m pregnant, and just crumbles into me right there, poor thing. And Tammy, she’s hardcore in a lot of ways. And bless her heart. All I could think to do was just hold her and say, and I thought about it for a moment, and granted, not a 100% sober. And I just said, know what? It’ll be all right. It’s all good. And she’s, really? Yeah, absolutely.
[00:12:35] Dan O Keeffe: So, we went to sleep. And then I woke up at 4 am. I just remember rising out of bed. What is the expletive? And somehow managed to go back to sleep. And the next day, we woke up. And it was unexpected to me that I would feel as excited as I was. But we the energy was there. We’re excited. It was like all right, grand adventure, let’s take this on.
[00:12:56] Dan O Keeffe: And then it was a matter of figuring out, okay, how long have you been pregnant? Let’s get this [00:13:00] confirmed. She went to see the doctor and yes, she wasn’t pregnant. And then, we’re not allowed to tell anyone for two and a half months, what the heck? Or whatever it was.
[00:13:06] Dan O Keeffe: I did my best to not tell anyone. But it’s interesting, I have to tell someone. And that someone is also, he’s already agreed to be on this podcast. And I’m anxious to do that. He’s a really cool guy. But he’s been a friend of mine for a number of years. And a lot of similarities to me. He was definitely in his 50s when he and his wife, who also used to work for me, and is a good friend of mine, when he and his wife had their one child. And they have a similar age difference as Tammy and I do. And I had to call someone. And I texted him, I was like, Hey, you got a minute for a phone call?
[00:13:38] Dan O Keeffe: And he called me and I just was like, what do I do? He’s ah, Dude, it’s great. You got this. It’s a wonderful thing. Everything I already mentioned, you guys are better set off and you’re better set in life. You don’t have some of the same worries that we all had in our 20s and 30s, and so on and so forth. So that was great. Again, I look forward to having him tell his story [00:14:00] here on the future episode.
[00:14:01] Dan O Keeffe: And it’s reshaped my life. My focus on work and career has changed almost 180 degrees. I’m still looking to grow the business, but at the same time, I’m now a little bit more focused in the years to come, what’s my exit strategy? Because let’s face it, when this kid is graduating high school, I’ll be in my early 70s. I want to not be working my butt off then. I want to be the guy who is able to take him to school events. I don’t know if I’ll coach any of his teams if he gets into sports, but I certainly want to be able to go to those games and even some of the practices.
[00:14:39] Dan O Keeffe: Tammy, again, much younger than me, and doing phenomenally well in the corporate world. And I want to encourage her to continue her trajectory. And frankly, when we were fostering, I often was the one going to the school events anyway, cause I just have a more flexible schedule. So I just want to continue and enhance that even more.
[00:14:56] Dan O Keeffe: And then also, I want to find ways to not [00:15:00] necessarily leave a legacy for Kai by any means, but somehow, leave breadcrumbs of creativity. So he sees who his dad was, and is as we grow, but just leave an impression that I hope I’d be proud of.
[00:15:14] Dan O Keeffe: But yeah, it is entirely reshaped my life, our life. My mom probably wishes that I had done 10 years or so earlier, but she’s all in on her grandson. So that’s exciting. And Tammy’s mom has been our nanny now for the two years plus that Kai’s been with us. And she’s great about that, and just having a blast as well.
[00:15:36] Dan O Keeffe: And we’re just beyond that, we’re figuring out as we go. He starts pre-K and just a couple of months, which is crazy to think about. And we’re trying to get him used to traveling. So far on planes, he’s done fairly well. He did great as a baby in the car.
[00:15:51] Dan O Keeffe: And about a year ago, he was acting up on our drive to Florida. So we didn’t get many hours in that particular day. But you know [00:16:00] what? We just did a road trip to and from Florida, two days each on either side of it. And he did great.
[00:16:06] Dan O Keeffe: Now I will admit, we took two cars, and he was in Tammy’s car the whole ride. Whereas, I was in my car with my sister and our young cousin. But from what I heard and you could observe, he did great. And boy, the folks at Cracker Barrel somewhere in Southern Kentucky will long remember our visit there, cause he was not happy.
[00:16:26] Dan O Keeffe: So we’re figuring all that out. And fingers crossed that he behaves at the FC Cincinnati game tonight.
[00:16:32] Mick Flynn: Yeah. Like you met so much of it, this age compared to when you’re in your 20s and 30s, if you had kids, you’re balancing so many different things, advantages and disadvantages. You mentioned, our moms are in their 70s. And the disadvantage to having kids this late, parents are older too.
[00:16:47] Mick Flynn: When you were in our 20s and 30s doing this, there’s more babysitting, there’s more doing that kind of stuff, you really can’t ask them to do a lot of now at the age they are. You’re balancing the wisdom of being older, but you’re losing [00:17:00] the help during the action, doing some of that.
[00:17:02] Mick Flynn: One thing too, you mentioned our fathers and are just, our parents are older. You’re in this weird state where, I’ve got a soon-to-be 12-year-old, soon-to-be-six-year-old, and a four-year-old. My mom is 73. It’s just you’re helping with your older parent, but also, we got these little kids. Again, a lot of people our age, their parents are their age, but their kids are teenagers, and their kids may be going to college. At this age, it’s just a big balancing act from what I’ve seen.
[00:17:28] Mick Flynn: Like vacations, you mentioned vacations, like you and I have gone on vacations. We went to Montreal together when we were young and single. And we went to Hawaii, those were fun vacations. Those were fun. But now, I realize when I take my kids, we went to Gatlinburg a few years ago, before Pierce, my son was born. It was Vince and Nora, we were in Gatlinburg. And I’m looking around, thinking, why am here? This isn’t fun. Why would I be here? I wouldn’t be doing this if not for them.
[00:17:57] Mick Flynn: And you realize, I’m not going to have fun for a [00:18:00] while. You’re just parenting at another place. But when I was younger, it was so much more fun. And I always tell people, people my age were like, their kids are about to leave, and about to go to college, and they have this feeling of, I can’t believe you’re doing this. But I always feel like, my 20s and 30s were way more fun.
[00:18:16] Dan O Keeffe: That’s a very great point. We had some pretty crazy times and that’s great. And I don’t regret any of that. I’m not done by any means. But you’re right, we’re moving at a slower pace in that regard, and vacations have taken on a whole different vibe.
[00:18:29] Dan O Keeffe: Again, we just got back from vacation, a week and a half ago. And it was constant. And we did certain things I’ll never do again. Like we rented a condo in Florida at the hottest time of the year on the second floor of this high rise, lugging stuff to and from the beach. Not doing that again like that.
[00:18:44] Dan O Keeffe: Cause by the time you’re done, you’re sweating bullets. And then you got to go back up to the pool and you have a little key to get into the gate every year. So I’m not doing that. You learn, but it’s great too when you’re down there in the pool with them, or on the beach with them, and building that little [00:19:00] sandcastle and playing in the water. And you’re like, ah, this is awesome. And you can vision years down the road, being in the surf with them. And I hope he loves water. He’s a little afraid of the ocean right now. He’ll play right up to it.
[00:19:14] Dan O Keeffe: But could even see him, maybe learn to surf. Cause again, we get down to Orlando a lot because I partially grew up there and Tammy’s got family there and I still have family there. And just being in the water in general, in the pool, oh my God, he was learning so quickly how to swim, all the swim lessons that he had received already. We’re all coming together. We could see it. And that’s exciting. And then on the couple nights when his grandmother who came with us, I was able to watch him, for us. Tammy and I were able to go out and have an adult meal, and when all the trappings that, and it felt great.
[00:19:45] Dan O Keeffe: So it’s a balance, right?
[00:19:47] Mick Flynn: Yeah. Last year, we went to Florida too. It was August. Vince turned 11, which is a tough age. It was probably the worst vacation I’ve ever had in my life because it was so hot. [00:20:00] But then you get these little glimmers of hope, so we went to Myrtle Beach this past spring, and it was fun.
[00:20:06] Mick Flynn: It was like, my daughter was swimming on her own. And it was like, this isn’t so bad. So you get this little like, all right, this is starting to, it’s still gonna be different. I do think, at this age, you mentioned how old you’re going to be when Kai graduates high school and you really start to do the math when you’re this age.
[00:20:24] Mick Flynn: Oh man, I’m going to be 64 when Pierce, my youngest graduates high school. My new life goal, because I feel like, talking about age, you don’t know a person who they really are until they’re 40. I think 40 is a good. So my goal is to make it to Pierce’s 40th birthday. I’ll be 86. And if I make it to his 40th birthday, I make it to all of their 40th birthdays and that’ll be a nice, life goal.
[00:20:49] Dan O Keeffe: I think I talked to her either. How old would you be at that time?
[00:20:52] Mick Flynn: I would be 86 when he turns 40. I could run for president.
[00:20:56] Dan O Keeffe: There you go. Yeah. Boy, I was thinking.
[00:20:58] Dan O Keeffe: Nick, that makes me think, [00:21:00] How old am I when Kai turns 40? I don’t even want to think about how old I’ll be. If I’m here, I’m happy. More power to me.
[00:21:05] Mick Flynn: You would be about what, 93? You could do it.
[00:21:07] Dan O Keeffe: I’m gonna try. Yikes. I’m gonna try.
[00:21:10] Dan O Keeffe: And one more thing, Mick, before I let you go is, two, I can only speak for myself, but I think, again, I’ve known you your whole life and I used to babysit you and I knew your dad well. But we didn’t have the world’s most traditional perfect dads, right?
[00:21:24] Mick Flynn: For sure.
[00:21:24] Dan O Keeffe: So that impacts how we want to raise our children as well. And without getting into the details, I’ll share my story. You had your dad your entire life, which is great. But my parents divorced when my sister and I were very young. So we only saw my dad after I turned five or six years old. We only saw him in the summers, in Florida, ungodly hot and humid. It was cool in that my father for a good chunk of that time worked in the theme park industry. He was the CFO for SeaWorld of Florida. And eventually, all of the SeaWorld parks for about 15 years, but he was a workaholic and just didn’t see him that much.
[00:21:56] Dan O Keeffe: So in the summers, it was my stepmother at the time who was carting us [00:22:00] around and doing things with us, bless her heart, love her to death. And I really only got to know my dad well as an adult when he retired early, he was a theme park consultant for 20-some-odd years until the day he died.
[00:22:11] Dan O Keeffe: There’s more to that story. He had been in the Navy, and had held a role that we always knew was he would never talk about. And only recently have we started to realize just why he never talked about it. It wasn’t that he a PTSD in the traditional sense.
[00:22:25] Dan O Keeffe: Whatever he was doing was, had nothing to do with Vietnam. And it was all a cold war and very top secret. And it was like, Holy cow, this is crazy. And you don’t learn those things by the way, until you’re going through his files. Nothing there that is telling of anything, except that found the letter from the CIA when they tried to recruit him, which was interesting. That made him a very reserved and stoic individual in his adult years, which impacted our lives.
[00:22:51] Dan O Keeffe: He was a big baseball fan, but not a great athlete. And he wasn’t with me in my formative years, except from the summers. And I didn’t see much of him. So, I never really [00:23:00] got into sports or at least baseball. He probably would have liked me too.
[00:23:04] Dan O Keeffe: With Kai, I want him to be as active as much as possible. I’m trying to stay as active as I can so that I can keep up with them and he can learn some of that for me, I hope. I know in your case, you’re a big football fan, a big soccer fan too, I know.
[00:23:19] Mick Flynn: I like it now. I think I like soccer better than baseball now.
[00:23:21] Dan O Keeffe: Okay. Why is that faster? Quicker?
[00:23:23] Mick Flynn: I just like going to the Fcs and Sandy games.
[00:23:25] Dan O Keeffe: They are good. Yeah, it’s a good time. You and your dad, your dad was a coach, right? he was always a coach for years beyond even as you guys were young adults. So you had that, which is great. But real quickly, what things do you want to repeat that your dad did and what things do you want to do differently?
[00:23:42] Mick Flynn: Yeah. On the different things, but you met my father, he passed away in 2019, and he was 69. He was a big drinker and he drank every day, which was the crux of why it was so tough with him. And I haven’t drank in 10 years. And for me, it’s been a great thing. And what I don’t want to [00:24:00] do is that with them. For me, they’re not going to see me do that, which is, that’s the goal anyway.
[00:24:04] Mick Flynn: For me, that’s been good. And just enables me to be a lot very present with my kids, and the things I want to do. But there are things that as I’m getting older, he could have done better on a lot of things. But then I also understand why he maybe was the way he was, and why he wasn’t around as much.
[00:24:24] Mick Flynn: And I think a big part of it, ’cause he was 23 when I was born. He was a kid himself. And I think of myself when I was 23 like he just wasn’t ready. And I think, part of adulthood is when you begin to look at your parents, as you know what, they could have done this better or that better, but they’re just a couple people trying to make it.
[00:24:46] Mick Flynn: Maybe the way I like things I do want to do like him, like I was coaching Vincent’s basketball team. He’s not a good basketball player, but I wanted to do that for my dad.
[00:24:55] Mick Flynn: And this was after he passed away, and I was trying to do a good job. [00:25:00] And it was one of the times I thought, because one thing about my dad, he was a really good football coach. Like he started in Pee Wee Football, and then he ended up coaching freshman football in high school. And it was probably one of the first times since he had passed away where I thought, man, I don’t know what I’m doing. I wish he was here. I could ask him, what do I do? How do I do this? And he would have told me. So, there are some of those things, but there isn’t much I would do like him. But he’s for me as a parent, I wouldn’t say the rearview mirror, but he was his own guy and it is what it is.
[00:25:32] Dan O Keeffe: Yeah. I guess I could say the same thing about mine. In some ways, actually, I knew your dad better than mine. Your dad and I definitely had our own special relationship. But was saw him a lot more in my childhood than my own dad. It is what it is.
[00:25:45] Dan O Keeffe: But Mick, we are coming up on time. I really appreciate you sharing your experience as a first and now second time. And I guess in a way, third-time father, right? No kidding. Yeah, exactly. And sharing what you’ve learned and your perspective moving forward.
[00:25:58] Dan O Keeffe: And to close [00:26:00] things out, I just want to say that I don’t know if you can see it on your screen, but there is a bird in the background. And it looks like for much of the interview has been sitting on your shoulder, you giving me a pirate vibe.
[00:26:12] Mick Flynn: I’m glad you brought that up. The reason why I’m here, I’m working at an office space and I rent it out because my kids and wife are home from school in the summer and I just can’t work with them around. So, it’s way nicer than my basement desk.
[00:26:26] Dan O Keeffe: All right. I will tell you that similarly, even though I am in my home studio, if you want to call it that home office, I actually just last week, I did join a co-working space as well, that also has a private Bourbon Bar on the first floor. So I can escape my child, wife, and mother-in-law as well for some privacy and to get some things done, and probably have a beverage.
[00:26:48] Mick Flynn: I do like your background. The fireplace. That was good.
[00:26:50] Dan O Keeffe: Thank you. And it’s hard to see, I’m still getting the lighting worked out. But this book right behind me is really a neat one that I think was Tammy that ordered that on Amazon. It says, Kai. It’s about me [00:27:00] and Kai. And it’s even Kai, you’ll always be my little boy.
[00:27:03] Dan O Keeffe: So that’s really cool. This is the O Keeffe family crest. That it’s hard to see, but a montage of photos with Kai and me. Then the other two things are just dog pictures. Cause it’s called old dogs.
[00:27:15] Mick Flynn: There’s nothing personal behind me.
[00:27:17] Dan O Keeffe: That’s all right. You’re plenty personal and personable on your own.
[00:27:21] Dan O Keeffe: All right. Buddy, I appreciate it. And appreciate you. And thank you everyone for tuning in to Old Dogs, New Tricks, episode one. And be on the lookout soon for episode two. This episode and future episodes are brought to you by O Keeffe PR and Marketing Solutions, creating content that connects.
[00:27:41] Dan O Keeffe: All right. Take care, Mick. We appreciate it. Take care everyone.
[00:27:44] Mick Flynn: Thanks a lot.
Welcome to this episode of Old Dogs, New Tricks! In this episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with my good friend Mick to discuss a topic that’s near and dear to both of our hearts: becoming fathers after the age of 40. Mick and I both became dads later in life, and we have plenty of stories, insights, and advice to share.
The Joys of Late Fatherhood
One of the first things Mick and I talked about was the sheer joy that comes with late fatherhood. There’s something incredibly special about welcoming a new life into the world when you’re a bit older and (hopefully) a bit wiser. Mick shared a touching story about the first time he held his baby girl, and I couldn’t help but get a bit choked up. We both agreed that the sense of gratitude and wonder we feel as older dads is truly unmatched.
The Challenges We Face
Of course, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Mick and I didn’t shy away from discussing the challenges that come with being an older dad. From the physical demands of chasing after a toddler to the societal pressures and stereotypes we face, there’s a lot to unpack. Mick mentioned how he’s had to make some lifestyle changes to keep up with his energetic son, and I shared my own struggles with balancing work, family, and self-care.
Wisdom and Experience
One of the advantages of becoming a father later in life is the wealth of experience and wisdom we bring to the table. Mick and I reflected on how our past experiences have shaped our parenting styles. We talked about the importance of patience, the value of quality time, and the lessons we’ve learned from our own fathers. Mick had some great advice for new dads, emphasizing the importance of being present and savoring every moment.
Personal Stories
Throughout the episode, Mick and I shared some personal stories that had us both laughing and tearing up. From the hilarious mishaps of diaper duty to the heartwarming moments of bedtime stories, we covered it all. Mick’s tale of his son’s first steps had me in stitches, while my story about my daughter’s first words brought a tear to my eye. These stories are a testament to the incredible journey of fatherhood, no matter what age you start.
Advice for New Dads
If you’re a new dad or expecting to become one soon, this episode is packed with advice. Mick and I offered tips on everything from managing sleepless nights to keeping the romance alive with your partner. We also touched on the importance of building a support system and not being afraid to ask for help. Our goal was to provide practical, relatable advice that can help new dads navigate the ups and downs of parenthood.
Conclusion
Fatherhood after 40 is a unique and rewarding experience, filled with its own set of challenges and joys. Mick and I had a blast sharing our stories and insights, and we hope you find them as entertaining and enlightening as we did. Whether you’re an older dad yourself, a soon-to-be dad, or just curious about the journey, this episode has something for everyone.
Don’t miss out on this honest and heartfelt conversation about fatherhood, age, and everything in between. Tune in to Old Dogs, New Tricks, and join us on this incredible journey. Listen to the full episode now and discover the joys and challenges of late fatherhood with Mick and me.
AND MORE TOPICS COVERED IN THE FULL INTERVIEW!!! You can check that out and subscribe at [www.youtube.com/@olddogs.newtricks.6844].
Connect with Dan O’Keeffe: https://okeeffepr.com
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